News

Gorilla Glue Girl Has Been Purged Of the Glue

By HHL JT
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After a month of being trapped by Gorilla Glue, Tessica Brown's hair is free.

Yesterday, Dr. Michael Obeng performed the four-hour surgery to remove the adhesive.

He waved his usual $12,500 fee for the procedure.

Obeng used a mixture of adhesive remover, aloe vera, olive oil, and a dash of acetone to counteract the glue's industrial-grade stickiness.

In addition to looking funny, Brown had been suffering headaches.

A Gorilla Glue rep said they are happy Brown's ordeal is over.

"We are glad that Miss Brown was able to be treated and we hope that she is doing well."

Brown had threatened to sue Gorilla Glue before the surgery.

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